A woman is first your mother, sister, girlfriend, lover & or wife. Most guys always complain about how difficult it is to understand the homosapien called WOMAN, she is virtually blamed for all the problems in the world presently, if not for her Adam won’t eat the Apple, we are also responsible for killing abacha ( the apple story, isn’t weird…whats with apple) we are also responsible for global warming and just maybe the increase in fuel proce in Nigeria presently.
As a guy, have you ever wondered why women are who they are or taken a critical look at this being to understand how our emotions really work. Let me educate y’all a bit. Now stop reading this if you are already telling yourself she is part of this gender so she will support the gender, if that is what is in your head or mind, then this post is not for you or you are not ready to understand her.
GET TO KNOW THIS SPECIE CALLED WOMAN
First things you need to understand with a woman is that she has a much better memory than the man (this is not an insult but just fact, calm down), especially when there’s an emotional component. Women attach their memories to their emotions – and also to their defense mechanisms.
Your woman has specific memories of you. She remembers who you have been, and everything you’ve done in the past. She still reacts to those memories, and she operates, and makes decisions, based on her memories of who you were a year ago, and three years ago, and five years ago.
“If you hurt her feelings last year by acting in a particular way, or if you said something unkind, that pain still lives in her. She feels the possibility that you could do it again – even if you’ve changed significantly since that time.
If a situation today is at all similar (in any way) to what happened in the past, then emotionally, this situation equals that situation. In computers, this is called ‘fuzzy logic.’ In the brain, it’s called ‘the cortex’s associative matrix.’
Women experience events as a huge set of related constructs and dominoes that all correlate across time. ‘If he did this and that, it means this and this, and that. And that’s going to mean this… and this means that could happen, and because of what happened ten years ago, it’s going to mean that, too. And then we’re going to have children, and they’re going to grow up and be like this because of that, and then my friends will think this about it, and they’ll react in that way, and my God, then what will happen?’
“This kind of thinking and speaking is totally baffling to men. A man’s thought process is more linear: this, then this, then this, then that. Women experience everything multidimensionally (which makes them good at multitasking).
From a woman’s point of view, the way women process information and feelings makes perfect sense. To men, it’s like an alien language. These processes are just very different from each other. They have the potential of being complementary and supportive of each other, which starts with UNDERSTANDING.
UNDERSTANDING & ACCEPTING THE WOMAN
However, these differences must be understood and accepted. Otherwise, when a man attempts to communicate with a woman on an emotionally-loaded issue, he’s likely to be overwhelmed by the woman’s rapid-fire communication. He’ll go into information overload. She’s going to say, ‘What about this, and this, and this, and this?’ He won’t be able to deal with all of those complexities, because he can’t process all of the emotional dimensions as quickly as she can rattle them off.
“He’s going to think she’s being defensive, or that she’s talking gibberish, or she’s adding extraneous information. As a result, he might get angry and frustrated, or try to shut down the conversation. All she’s doing is communicating her emotional reality. She’s living it from moment to moment, and she assumes that it’s all vital information he needs to know.
“It’s how she understands the world, and how she makes decisions, moment by moment. It’s how she takes care of her own well-being, self-esteem, and her own place in society. It’s how she cares for and manages all of her relationships.
“This is why men appear emotionally unavailable to women, and why they appear to be less emotionally involved in the relationship. He doesn’t have the ability to process her emotional communications. It’s one reason why men don’t listen more to women, and they appear to be living on different planets. Men can learn this language, but they have a hard time keeping up. There’s usually a time lag for him to get and understand her feelings.”
So the next time you think she is speaking gibberish or nagging you, just think she actually trying to express herself in the only way she knows how to and try to listen.
NB – The moment your girl isn’t speaking this gibberish anymore, she does not care anymore and over you.